After Hours

Night time SUCKS for me! It's by far the hardest time of the day. It goes a little something like this:

5pm:

• The J's are both Hungry and tired
• I start a healthy dinner

6pm:

• Depending on the day either I'm nursing j to sleep for the night and Nick and big J are eating my healthy dinner, and I scarf food later OR We sit down as a perfect little family, no one throws food, no one screams, and everyone eats the perfect caloric intake :) (sarcasm anyone?)

7-8pm:

• I'll spare you of the details here, but the J's are finally in bed, Nick and I sit down at our caddy corner computer desks and stare at our bright screens while discussing our day. 
• AND THEN IT STARTS...

I've tracked my calories, I've done so well during the day, I've said no... A LOT, I haven't allowed myself to get so hungry I ate everything in the pantry and the fridge and overall I've proud of myself. But something is super unsettling. I want ice cream, I want chocolate, did someone say Cake? Forget going on Pinterest during this time because I usually just sit there and droll at the screen at all the yummy recipes. It's seriously out of control. I tell myself I should go for a walk, do some push ups .. GO TO BED?!?! Nope, I want nothing to do with any of my other choices, I just want to snack, and I really really really just want sugar! For the past few nights I've started chewing gum. It's actually helped quite a bit! I just can't believe that food has such control over my life. It's really ridiculous, but I"m actually feeling really relieved to finally opening up and sharing some of these feelings that I'm going through. 

Do you have night time cravings? How do you settle them? 

And I'll leave you with an ironic story that has nothing to do with anything I just wrote! 

A few entries back I talked about how I wasn't sure I wanted the whole internet world knowing my business  and I used my daughter J pooping on the potty as an example just because we have been trying to make it happen for so long and I knew I would be excited when it finally did happen. No joke, the next day I saw her making some funny movements asked her "Do you need to go poop on the potty?" She of course, like the past 6 months replies "NOPE!" Then she stops....... waits.... looks at me and yells "I POOP ON POTTY!!!!"  all while running to the bathroom, and yes my little 2.4 year old daughter pooped on the potty and we celebrated with a big old tootsie pop, from her Halloween stash, HA!There you have it folks, don't tell me I didn't warn ya!